story of my life

pseudonym

We hide for so many different reasons. Even if those reasons are entirely in our heads.

We hide because it’s easier to deal with things from behind our defenses.

We hide to become invulnerable.

For the person behind the pseudonym, being discovered can be as disconcerting as it is exhilarating. Because when we shed the disguise, the game becomes too real, the sharp stab of pain, just a bit too palpable.

And then we run to hide again.

unposted letters

in the gaps that we leave between our conversations, words gather.
they crowd and jostle to find their place. some never make it to you at all.

the gaps will get longer, and your absence will grow more profound.
my words will gather, then eventually they'll fade away.

I will write letters to you in my head
but never post a thing.

the beginning

D'you remember when I said I was going to be a crazy-cat-lady someday?
Of course you do! Because I never stopped saying it.

I could just see myself at 60, surrounded by around 17 cats in various states of disinterested condescension, just sitting and lying about, in a smelly old house, while I huddle in a rocking chair and cackle madly.
Aah! that's the life. not!

And now, to my helpless horror and indignation, I've laid ze feline foundation!
I now have not one, but TWO cats!
Yes, just let that sink in for a moment.

Two damn kittens destroying everything,  snapping at my heels, following me everywhere...
*sigh*
This is the beginning of the end, my friends.